Women are whores. But men can be serious fucking douchebags.
I'm turning my attention away from the whores for a moment to address something that bothered the fuck out of me when I read it. Some numbnuts in Pennsylvania took it upon himself to shoot up an LA Fitness, specifically targeting (and killing) women. What the fuck.
Gentlemen, this is a sad story in many ways. We have a man gone ridiculously wrong, and we have perfectly serviceable women who lay dead. I've read this guy's blog, and read the news stories, and can only come to one conclusion: he suffered from douchebagius megamus.
For you laymen out there, that he means he was a colossal douchebag. Why? Because he validated his existence on women's approval (or disapproval). This need to be validated consumed his every move, and eventually led to his demise. And he fucking took women with him. Douchebag.
Fuck him. He gets no sympathy from me. He bitches and whines in his blog about his brother bullying him and his mom being too dominant. Fuck you Mr. Douchebag. Try growing up in an urban jungle, where your next turn could lead to your last turn. Try living with an alcoholic father or better yet, an absent father. Ask any inner city kid, life is fucking tough. But that doesn't give you license to blame your woes on some random person and end their life.
To prevent this kind of douchebaggery from occurring again, I'm offering to you gentlemen a guide on how NOT to be a douchebag, and save your life in the process (and the life of valuable women in the process). This is in no particular order.
1. Be the Best Motherfucking Man You Can Be.
Don't fucking focus on women. Focus on your life. Be a fucking man at everything you do. If you are a software developer, develop the shit out of that software. Make it come fucking alive. Focus on your shit. Everything you do should be to achieve some inner goal. Don't let anything stand in your way.
The guy that shot those women repeatedly said he feared being laid off, but then he got a promotion. He moaned and moaned about work. Fuck that bs. Blaze your own path. Man up and develop a plan to do something if you're not happy. If that means opening a fucking smoothie stand in Florida, then so be it. Just have some fucking ambition.
Whores flock to ambition like its a fucking Coach bag fire sale. They love it when a man can fucking hold his own and then some. They like men who own shit, work on shit, and do shit. They hate losers and they bore easily.
If you focus on the fact that you haven't been laid in 30 years, then you're fucking asking for Satan to come knocking. Be a man, garner some ambition, and build yourself a fucking life.
2. Exude Confidence.
Any man worth his salt understands that women don't react well to overaggressive types who try to marry them after the first date. Worse yet, though they like older men, they HATE that old creepy fuck in the corner. They lose their panties around guys that exude confidence. Whores love a guy that knows he doesn't need the validation of a woman. That's been proven time and time again.
That douchebag kept crying that everyone thought he was a nice guy, good looking, but couldn't get laid. If you think like that, it projects to every whore you meet. Whores are very adept and can smell it if you're awkward or off-center. Fuck being a nice guy. Nice guys don't even finish.
How do you attain confidence? Stop being such a bitch. Wake up, grab some breakfast, tell yourself that you are a man, and go on about your business. It's all in your head. If you act like you are the cock of the walk, your cock will thank you. It's not hard.
Go buy some new clothes, including a nice, clean, three piece suit. Put that shit in your closet for some occasion. Wash your piece of shit car, or get a new car. Take a shower and shave. Walk out that door every morning smelling like sex panther. Walk with your chest out and your head held high. And most importantly, keep telling yourself that you don't need anyone's approval. You are a fucking man. You approve them.
Exude motherfucking confidence.
3. Be Positive
This is a fucking must. Negativity projects like that stank from a whore's cooch. If you continuously have negative thoughts and beliefs, then you will be a douchebag for life. Women hate negativity.
Thinking positive is easy. My client didn't pay me today? Worse, I can't land any clients? Fuck it, I'm going to make it happen. See how easy that was. And you'd be surprised how that shit would be made to happen.
More importantly, your positive attitude will be noticed and rewarded by whores. They like men who smile and are generally happy. That's normal to them. Not creepy. Always remain positive, and your dick will be in a vaginal paradise in short order.
4. Get Rich Bitch
This isn't for everyone. You need to keep it in perspective. And I've noticed that my poorest days are/were my happiest days. But money is a fucking bonus. If you made it past 30 without getting married, kudos to you. But let's be realistic here. Unless you're already doing what this list dictates, you might be the next 49 year old creepy fuck.
Old poor guys do not get whores. If you are going to grow old and chase twenty-somethings, you need cash money. Whores are an expensive habit. And you better have a fucking boat, condo, and banging BMW to get you laid on a weekly basis.
Twenty-something whores are still developing mentally. They like older men, but the young men still entice them for marriage purposes. They aren't sure it's ok to be sexually open, so they hide their whore ways. They go on nice vacations and go clubbing and bar-hopping. They party like it's their job. And if you want to hang in that atmosphere, you had better come equipped.
Being a TPS reporting software developer isn't going to get you anywhere unless you have a horse cock or deadly tongue game. Money makes the whore go round. Go out and make that cash money. You'll not only get what you want when you want it, but you'll also notice whores coming around more often. Just remember to keep it in perspective. Gold-diggers do not a wife make.
5. Get Some Fucking Girlfriends
The number one way to pique a whore's attention is to be with another knockout whore. Those guys that tell you that men and women cannot be friends is fucking your girlfriend. And her friends. I'm speaking from personal experience. Most whores who read this blog won't believe this, but I have a fucking bevy of girls who I routinely go out with, and I get noticed like a motherfucking white man in South Central.
The biggest advantage of keeping lady friends is that you are instantly vouched for. When a whore sees you with another whore, you are not that creepy old fuck. Obviously, if you are 50 and with some 25 year olds, some whores will label you as a creep, but fuck them, you don't need their validation. But generally speaking, being with girls brings more girls. It's a well kept secret. And I've just shared it with you.
Make friends with whores. Hang out with them and do what they like to do. Don't display any interest in their vagina or fellatio skills. One of two things will happen. One, you will get laid. Or two, you will make friends with her, and be in with her friends. One of those friends will want to fuck you, as long as you play cool.
Another advantage of making friends with whores is that eventually, one drunk night, she make just fuck your brains out for no good reason. How can you say no to that shit?
Being around whores will get you accustomed to how they operate and how you should act around them. That should prevent you from becoming a creepy old dude who blames women for everything wrong with him. Don't be a douchebag.
There's plenty more ways to prevent douchebaggery. But this list should get you started down the right path. Remember, whores are plentiful. And they should be treated with respect, as long as they are righteous whores. Chasing women is a fucking bonus level in this game we call life. If done correctly, we can shatter the high scores and own the night. But you need to be a man. Be a fucking man.
Don't Be a Douchebag.
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