I know it's been a long time but I'm back by popular demand. My inbox is flooded with fan mail from both men and women and I decided I needed to get this site back in full swing. Since women are clearly becoming fans of this site even though I've politely asked them to leave, we're going to start with a lesson for whores today. How to keep a fucking man. Why is it that men cheat? Is it because we are primitive animals blinded by lust? Hardly. I knew many men who never so much as batted an eye at another chick. But eventually they did. There was something that finally clicked in their head.

Ladies, you love to call men dogs and loathe women who attract hundreds of guys. You nag, bitch, moan, and then wonder how in the fuck your casanova got blown by a sultry redhead on a dirty Friday night. I'm going to give you a secret today that should help you keep that fucking guy of yours. Ready? Here it is: TAKE CARE OF YOUR MAN.

No nagging. No bitching. No moaning (allowed only in sexual situations). Your man works ridiculously hard for you. You just don't know it. I don't care if he's a fucking bum sitting at home on the couch.. A blowjob and a hot meal will work wonders for his confidence. And I bet he'll get his ass to work quicker than a call girl.

This reasoning escapes whores for some reason. They've been trained to be chased and loved and showered with affection. That Cinderalla bullshit has whores all fucked up. They think they're the only ones in the relationship, and thus should be worshipped, which most douchebags willingly oblige. BUT God help you if your guy catches the whore eye of a gal at work. If you don't take care of your man, you bet she will. Cubicle nooner? Check.

What do I mean by take care of your man? I mean try to understand that he's a man. And we men require very little upkeep. We need to be fed, fucked, and left alone. It isn't rocket science. A bite to eat for him when he comes home will make him feel like a man. A random blowjob while he's cursing at a sports game is a fucking game changer. Trust me. Throw on a sexy outfit one night for him and fuck his brains out. See below.

And this is not a joke. So next time you decide your man is not sensitive enough and you want to pick fights over bullshit, remember the Cubicle whore. They lurk in every office, construction site, and corner. When you feel the urge to nag, you should have nuclear sirens going off in your head. Remember, that slut will make your man feel like a man again if you don't.